Sweet Dreams

It just might be the pain killers my mom gave me. They were SUPER super strength, and I'm sooo dizzy but sooo energized... but I'm not really in pain anymore, haha. Anyway, here I lay on my bed, listening to B.O.B's "Nothing On You," just thinking about what's next. Arrielle's in town. Broomball's on Thursday. Bad romance. Calling the Admissions Offices... shit. International Assembly auditions. My debut! SO much, I'm so dizzy...

But I can't stop thinking about... the what if's. It's been a refrain in my ear for some time now, whispering without voice and touching with just eyes. How can you be so beautiful and feel so much like betrayal? I laugh when I think about it, and the dreams I've been having. The Egyptian fantasy. The secret phone call. I'm so disappointed in what's happening, but it's hilarious.

Mixed emotions, though.

1: "I want your love, I don't wanna be friends..." - Bad Romance, Lady Gaga
3: "My guilty pleasure, I ain't goin nowhere, baby 'long as your here, I'll be floatin on air." - Sweet Dreams, Beyonce
2: "Baby you the whole package... you keep it real while them others stay plastic." - Nothing on you, B.O.B.

Everything's such a blur now when it comes to those memories, or the hope for them to be memories.
I just wanna laugh so hard.

Either way, I don't wanna wake up from you.