1984

I successfully knocked out an entire task on my summer reading list. I have three more books to go, and I am so there by tonight. I looove George Orwell's writing. He's the only political allusionist I think I could ever understand. However, I think I only fell for him halway this time. I was so disappointed at the end of "1984", but that's how it had to end. The truth was, it was above his will the way it would be above us. It made me realize how we take for granted all the little things. Physically, within each other, most especially. I could talk about the importance of privacy and sticking it to Big Brother, but I'd like to pick on the relationship between two people.

I don't feel like Julia was meant for Winston. In any case, Winston was meant for Julia. There is probably no other character in Oceania suitable for Winston in both aesthetics and communication, but their mindsets were off. She sees both sides to it and decides to get by through deceit and closet rebellion, namely from the waist down, as Winston says. And he doesn't quite know yet where he stands behind enemy lines, because he's certainly against Big Brother but he even admits that he's unsystematic about where he actually is. They get along because they experience chemistry and communication only found between themselves, but she's not as passionate about the Brotherhood as she is about Winston, himself. To love Winston is to embrace his passions as well, is it not? I'm not talking about recreational hobbies, but his state of mind, purpose, and spirit.


She falls asleep whenever he brings up what's most important to him and discourages his aggression towards these ideals and to just live life as "whatever" as long as they're happy. As he watches her supple body and feels his curves against his skin, Winston is content and finds charm in her cute disposition. But that's just charm. His grateful eyes and true smiles eventually shine for O'Brien. The madman who tortures him. Who engraves into his mind that "WAR IS PEACE, FREEDOM IS SLAVERY, 2+2=5, and GOD IS POWER". Why does Winston find more ardency for O'Brien?

Because unlike his love interest, O'Brien understands Winston. Winston can speak to him, as a fellow human being who knows his mind and can be his friend. Even if O'Brien is an inhuman human. Despite O'Brien coming from the land of TopsyTurvy, Winston values him more than Julia.

When I read, I try to place myself in the text. Don't ask me why, it's just a quirky thing I do, haha. But here... I couldn't tell if I was Julia or O'Brien. If I was on Winston's side, yet passive and in it for kicks and being a girlfriend, or understanding of Winston yet being completely against him, challenging Winston yet bringing him to self-evidence. Then as Winston, I couldn't tell who I would choose to be with in the "Golden Country", (Winston's happy place in his dreams): the person who is in retrospect, perfect for me in a very "settling" and "finishing" way, or the one person who stimulates my mind and keeps me thinking until the very end, no matter how crazy and opposing they actually are. In the end, of course, he betrays Julia and O'Brien kills him. Winston feels nothing except surrender to the man.

In turn, I would betray the one person who I was perfect for, to be killed by the one I chose in my heart instead. Wonderful, right? Truly a martyr -__-






Orwell probably accomplished exactly what he wanted through my disgruntled response to the novel as a whole (not just me being sour over the relationship parts, ahaha).